Thesis on the Known Universe

Never mind. I am not important.

What you need to know is that everything bad happens for no reason. I would like to say it makes you stronger, that it leads you somewhere else, or that it teaches you a lesson. It doesn’t. Everything happens randomly. Enjoy your time. Watch for falling objects.

If I told you what had happened to me you would be amazed. You wouldn’t believe it. You would drink your beverage and smoke your cigarette and stare into the distance for a good, long time.  You would forget I was here. You would let your mind wander back to the first person you loved–really loved–and you would linger in her apartment thinking how even then the two of you were dying. Consider the flowers. There are bees.  Your coffee is getting cold. Who is this person sitting before you telling you to watch for falling objects? What does that even mean? Things don’t just fall.

You should have listened.

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