My delusions are interrupted when I look at the muted television set and see my picture. The scroll reads, “Cockwhore: The Final Decline of Western Civilization.” The normal impulse is to turn the set up and see why one has been so maligned, but I read the news before it's news, so I’d known this … Continue reading “That’s no reason to be a cockwhore,” she says. “I loved you just the way you were.”
Being a middle aged man is some lonely shit. There is nowhere to make friends anymore, and the people you socialize with are usually work colleagues or neighbors, whose relationships with you prohibit the disclosure of revealing, intimate, or even merely controversial information. In a very real sense your existence is defined by your ability … Continue reading On Professional Sports
The next day I walked into the Devery University human resources department, and met Colletta. I told her, “I want to be the director of your library. I have written my resume in a way that corresponds to that job description, and you will see that I went to the highly regarded MLIS program at … Continue reading I have a black light closet off of my guest bedroom. It is spacious enough to accommodate five adults.
Behind the airport is a circular clearing of grass surrounded by thick, thorny brush and dense trees. Apollo and I found it one day on one of our epic hikes looking for empty bottles to throw at things that annoyed us. We recognized the clearing as something unique even then, strung out as we were … Continue reading As it turned out, girls were even harder to come by than drugs
In the year I moved here the tall, red building had an incident. Every day the sun's heat would expand the window, and every evening the air conditioning would shrink it again. Over time this small, almost imperceptible movement stretched the seal around the window. This was an effect known to physicists and architects. But … Continue reading Ratios