I need to find Katie, check with the league, evade the snipers, avoid the celebrity cheese vigilantes, and find out where I am supposed to be next. Uzbekistan is a big country. I don’t even know where I am supposed to land. Do they even have airports there? I round the corner and shrink back. … Continue reading I need to find Katie, check with the league, evade the snipers, avoid the celebrity cheese vigilantes, and find out where I am supposed to be next. Uzbekistan is a big country.
When Katie walks in the door I recognize her at once. She maintains her sporty looks and pixie haircut. I relish watching her as she is unaware of me, looking from sombrero to sombrero wondering which I am under. But I am not wearing a sombrero, just in case they sent an agent. She is … Continue reading I believe I hear police sirens. I strain. Yes. Unmistakable. We need to leave.
Hammond Wry is the screen name of one Damen Ginzberg who lives in his parents’ basement in their middle class home in Hammond, Indiana. He understands the town’s bleak economic outlook, from its dearth of established high-paying jobs to the scarcity of interesting entry-level opportunities. Moreover, he recognizes, in part by overhearing his parent’s desperate, … Continue reading For if playing by the rules guarantees that you lose, why bother playing?
“OK, say you have always wanted to eat Gwyneth Paltrow but realize that cannibalism is wrong. You would stalk her and when she is asleep or passed out or otherwise unsuspecting, you swab some part of her body that has bacteria on it--” “All of her body has bacteria on it.” “Right, I know. But … Continue reading As Always I am Helpless
We’re at the construction site where the new I-69 will cut through town. We watch the traffic pulse on I-30. They would never see us, here, naked, on this giant, flaming orange earth mover, as they pass by upwards of 75. We’ve just had sex and are waiting for the sun to set before we … Continue reading They stalk celebrities and cultivate their bacteria into cheeses.